Tuesday 20 May 2008

Not so secret squirrel

Well, it's been a while. I once forsook the (Sq)wirral for the bright lights of London town, and for five years I was seduced by the Big Smoke, but now I've come to my senses and returned to the motherland- sorry- peninsula.

So this is the point at which I should reveal an astonishingly exciting and scurrilous secret about life on The Squirrel. Sadly the cupboard of scandal is bare this evening, on account of only taking up residence at the weekend.

So perhaps instead I can educate the uninitiated in the ways of The Squirrel?

The first point to note is that you are never "in Squirrel" or "on Squirrel" but "in The Squirrel" or "on The Squirrel." This is owing to the peninsula geography of The Squirrel. Let me explain: A peninsula is a finger of land surrounded on three of four sides by water. In the case of The Squirrel it is a land mass which huddles between North Wales and Liverpool, bathed in the waters of the rivers Dee and Mersey and hangs onto Cheshire for dear life. Hence it is "The Squirrel Peninsula", or "The Squirrel" for short.

Part WAGS playground (Caldy), part chavs paradise (the north end) it's a strange little almost-island which over the years has spawned Paul O'Grady, John Peel and Nelson's bit of crumpet.

On that glamorous note I'll bring the first entry to a close.

2 comments:

Alan Joseph Slater said...

You're getting into this blog malarky very easily, aren't you, petal... but is there not a little shame attached to being in a part of the country which is home to WAGS & Chavs?

By the way... your post is timed [on my wonder-Mac] as being at 15.28... does this mean that "The Squirrel" is, as was once thought, in a completely different time zone to the rest of the "Empire & Colonies"?

Apropos of which, remember Accrington Stanley & the Old Reprobate's Squirrel experience... the gem of the area known as Hoylake!

By another way... glad to see that the squirrel is red rather than grey or black!

Keep smiling... & make sure you check on the Teddy Bear on the Highway of the aggressive coward!
X

Alan Joseph Slater said...

Lawks-a-mussy! Just noticed that my response was timed at 16.50... clearly global time zones have gone into meltdown! Is this the end of the world as we know it?... Where's that spaceship?... time to go home and face the consequences of the ire of my mother planet! Aaaargh! the pain, the pain of transfiguration... I see more teddy bears and more dancing!!! X